Tuesday, September 16, 2014

B Fit: 11 Things That You Should B Telling Yourself Daily

1. I am enough

Me, myself, and I!  All my  idiosyncrasies, all my imperfections, all my madness. I am enough. I am worthy of all the great things in this world. I am worthy of respect, I won't accept less.  It can be so easy to get caught up in reaching for more, self improvement is imperative, but feeling that you are enough now, is also important. Work on you, improve you, but accept you today, as an ever-changing, ever growing masterpiece.

 2. Today is A New Day & I Will B Present

Yesterday is gone and tomorrow isn't what matters. We have the habit of looking backward or forward, missing the present moment. Being thankful for breathing, being surrounded by people that matter, matters. If you are so busy being caught up in tomorrow, you will miss today, so honor today, be present.

3. My mistakes don't define me, they shape me

We all make mistakes, that is as human as human gets. Mistakes are not meant to haunt you, they're meant to teach you a valuable lesson. Find the lesson, learn and move on.

4. I get to decide how all of today's events affect me

You get to decide whether you have a great day or a terrible day, you can choose whether the morning traffic stresses you out or whether you turn up the music and relax. You don't get where you want to go any faster by complaining, but you will feel better if you relax, enjoying the time you have before the madness starts.

5. I trust myself to take on every task and to handle anything that comes my way

Saying this implies that you know that no matter what your day brings you will get through it.

6. If today was my last day, would I be ok with the people closest to me?

Even when you are fuming mad, before you leave those you love, remind them that you love them. You can say "I love you" in an angry tone (you can try. Ha!) just make sure they know. Tomorrow isn't a guarantee. Make amends whenever possible.

7. Look for the lesson

Every situation has a lesson, look hard enough and you will see it. So much can be learned from every situation, we often miss it because we aren't looking. Finding the lesson or "silver lining" will turn a negative into a positive. We all could use more positivity in our day to day, positivity is a choice you make, it's not conducive to life situations. Resentful people are resentful for numerous reasons, but they often don't see the benefit of what they learned from any given situation. Learning will tune out the negativity of most situations.

8. Today, I will do something kind for another person

Hold a door, pay for someone's coffee, compliment someone. One little thing. It's not that hard, you never know, you may brighten someone's day that really needed it.

9. I will not compare myself to others. I will not compare my life to theirs

This one can be hard. This is a problem because when we compare anything, whether that be ourselves or our life to others. We always look at all that is right with them or their lives and all that is wrong with ours. We never get the see the full picture of their life. Decide what your BEST is, decide what you want for you and your life, aspire to that, do YOUR best, don't worry about what everyone else is doing, or how they're doing it.

10. Ask questions

This could also be listen more than you speak, it's amazing what you learn from listening & asking questions. Listening to another person, listening closely, will tell you all you need to know about that person. People say who they're when they speak. Asking questions allows you to learn so much, never be afraid to acquire more information.

11. I will do something small today to accomplish my dreams

You may have small dreams or big ones, you may be putting in all your time, or some of your time. Dreams or goals can seem big if you look at the whole picture, almost overwhelming. The best thing you could ever do is make a commitment to one small thing a day, one small step towards what you want, it adds up.

Monday, September 15, 2014

B Beautiful: What You Need To Know About Hate

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion

Everyone is entitled to their own negativity and positivity as they so choose

This means, they're also completely allowed to keep it to themselves 

It's up to you, if you sleep in the bed they make. 
Haters come in many different forms, yes, there is one in all of us. Nobody is exempt or excluded, there isn't a special type that is "chosen" that can have and use this ability. We're all capable of having, creating and even stopping hate. 
  There is a common saying of "hate is a strong word" it seems we find the word harsh to say, even a bit taboo at times, but when it comes down to the actual act of hate, it's thrown around so casually we can forget when we're doing it or the impact that it has.

Hate is not a detachment from the situation, in fact it's the total opposite. 

Despite whatever someone would like you to believe, what the giver of hate would like to believe for themselves, hate is not a detachment from anything. Having such a strong aversion or detest to something, has emotion behind it. Hate is more about the person giving it, than the one that is receiving it, there is a reason they choose this destructive emotion. Still too often hate and negativity to the recipient, is perceived as something that is their fault entirely. 
Hate Has A Kickback

It is a weapon in itself, causing destruction wherever you choose for its use to be  
for harm, or hurt in a situation of fear & defense.

Why is this a destructive emotion? Because of what it does to the person that is giving it out, not only does it have major health disease causing impacts, but it also brings with it a mix of feelings that, to the person in that moment, up lifts them. With everything is this world, for every action there is a reaction and even an emotion such as hate, is included in this rule. 

A person will give hate and feel hate for a number of reasons, but it always comes back to one person, themselves. Hate is developed in many ways and has different elements. There is an extremely common link between it and a place of lack. This lack in the persons mind could be in any area of life, whether that be in the range of fame, career, fortune, future, family  and looks. 

It's also especially prevalent when it comes to using it as a defense mechanism, in  the areas of not feeling important in certain situations, not feeling heard, that their opinion doesn't matter or having superiority amongst others. Everyone has their own unique makeup of what hate is and why their using it.  

There is a big difference between someone who shares their opinion, gives constructive criticism and has a dislike. Any of these come from a place of love, if not from the place of love, in the very least a place of positivity.    

It would be easy to say "just stop surrounding yourself with hate" that is very much easier said than done. You can't have control over the emotions of the people in your life or around you. You can't control them and their own personal situations. The personal discovery of how toxic hate is found at different times for everyone.  What you can make the decision of, is what you absorb into your own world, what you take in and what you put out.      

Thursday, September 11, 2014

17 Reasons Why The BBB B Men Bootcamp is For You

You're a man.
 That is either in a relationship with a woman or would like to be.

We can help improve your confidence in your approach to women, giving you a guide to how to approach women and why it's not as complicated or difficult as some may think it is.

We can provide you with a better understanding of what you're looking for, in the sense of qualities and needs to help pin point if a woman is the right match for you.

Help you with communication in future or current relationships when it comes to asking for what you want, expressing needs, emotion or just developing a stronger connection.

In life sometimes we develop subconscious blocks that keep us from finding the love we deserve. With our bootcamp we will discover any blocks you may have, blocks that may have otherwise gone unnoticed and give you a solution.

You continually have the same argument with the woman in your life, you think that you've spent the time working it out with her, only to have it thrown in your face the second that you have another disagreement. We can give you the tools, that make this old tired argument obsolete.

You just can't seem to get a handle on what or how a woman thinks, just when you think you have her figured out, she flips the script on you. Or you want to improve the relationship that you currently have.

If you're looking for that special woman, that you can have a lasting relationship with.

Sometimes in life and in love we can get stuck in a rut, which is frustrating in itself.

Everybody wants love and to be loved. If you're looking to have a relationship with a woman that is above the status quo, we don't do mediocre.

We're currently in the era of coaches, we use them in business, in life and in love. Why use a coach?  As a coach we see things you may not even realize, giving you an honest answer that isn't tied to you in anyway emotionally (friends/family) We can give you the tools to take your life and your love to the next level.

Unlike most online coaching you will find, we're hands on, our course will be tailored to fit your needs. We do this so that you get the best possible advice and life changes for you.

A Dating coach offers you the most relevant, up-to-date methods to changing your life, relationships and future relationships. We offer you only tried and true methods, that have worked on thousands singles/couples all over the world.

Helping you to find the right person, giving you the tools to maintain a relationship.

The best investment you could ever make, is the investment you make in yourself.

Our course may be 3 weeks, but the changes you will receive will benefit you for the rest of your life.

We're currently taking in new clients, for our 2nd B Men BootCamp, our space is limited. It's our mission to give every single person, the one on one time that you deserve to get the most out of our course, your success is our success. We so look forward to helping you, everybody deserves to be loved, to have that special someone that you love spending time with. The world can be a lonely place, no one likes spending their life alone, we were meant to walk hand in hand with another person. Someone that you can share the life that you've made for yourself with.

Improving the world through relationships, one person at a time .

Sign up today! 

Contact us today about your 30 minute consultation at no cost to you

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

B Love: Domestic Violence...Could This B You?

So many times lately the questions have been posed "why would she stay with him, why would she marry him knowing what he's like?"

You can't pick the face of domestic violence out in a crowd, unless of course she has the bruises, the fat lip, or any other battle wounds. We're asking the wrong questions of the wrong person, it's so easy to lay the blame on the victim. Although in this case both people were rightfully, charged with domestic violence. Regardless of your gender, if you put your hands on another person, you should be charged, especially in a domestic situation,  most painfully where there are children involved, let's back it up a little though.

Domestic violence doesn't start with the pictures that we see in the police reports, if the new and exciting person that you are patiently waiting, to pick you up at your door in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 minutes. Nobody starts a relationship with someone that is trying to over power, dominate, or that uses violence against you.

It starts with much more subtleties than that, otherwise the relationship would be over way before it even had time to begin. Who is going to date someone that physically, emotionally or mentally abuses you? Abuse slips into your life, like a thief in the night, those things that used to seem endearing can actually be the red flags that are flying at full mast. The way that he is always protecting you, not wanting to share you for one minute with anyone else, friends or family. Him being there for you unconditionally, always being your shoulder to cry on, as you tell him how so and so has victimized you, sending you straight into his protective arms. He takes what people do to you extra hard, holding a grudge against anyone that dares to hurt your feelings or sensibility. That attention that he fans you with at first, feels like he is definitely the man that you have been waiting for. Streaks of jealousy he explains away, just because "he loves you so much, he couldn't see his life without you in it, perhaps he mentions that he may take his life without you in it." All these things feel really normal, until they aren't.  

 It is hard to tell where to draw the actual lines of things that are above and beyond the euphoria, that is new love. Well usually until it's too late, even then you may not recognize exactly what you've gotten yourself into, friends, loved ones or family may try to bring it to your attention, "what do they know, they've never had a love like this, and are totally jealous of you finding your soul mate, and no one has been in love quite like THIS?" Eventually you get tired of hearing your friends and family bickering back and forth with him, you're forced to choose a side, nobody chooses family or friends, or rarely anyway, he needs you away from your normal support system, complete and total alienation, you have him to turn to.

Those streaks of jealousy become very significant, they're suddenly battles, instead of his anger going to another male that he thinks is too close, you get blamed, because you must have done something to provoke the attention that a complete stranger is lavishing on you.  Abuse has rungs of a ladder that it slowly climbs, it usually starts verbally, ever so slight as him not acknowledging you, perhaps it's a small as ignoring your opinion, telling you that you're stupid, trying to find any flaw that you possess, and constantly reminding you of it. He needs to lower your self esteem down to his level where he can keep you dependent on him, where he can keep you in check, so he is in control of the situation at all times. He likes to remind you, how "lucky that you're to have him, you could never find another man that would love you as much as he does" He's quick to control the purse strings, perhaps he likes to award you with things when he's happy with you, only to revoke whatever trinket he's dangled in front of you, when he's upset and angry with you.

All the reasons that he was attracted to you, suddenly become a bone of contention with him, "do you really have to dress like that when you leave the house, your friends are such sluts?!" He can't trust you out with them because they're after every man that they see. The mental/verbal abuse changes, he's now graduated to pushing you against that wall, or dragging you out of a night out with friends by  your arm, because you've managed to piss him off. Any situation that he feels uncomfortable in, or he feels like he is losing control of you, is the worst feeling in the world for him, he hits overdrive to show his dominance of you, whatever that may be. Oh he will be very sorry the next day, begging that it will never happen again, he will seek help marriage counselling, ANYTHING, just to keep you with him, begging for your forgiveness.

Entry of the honeymoon stage, he will be on his best behavior until he feels that he has control and power over you and the situation again, until the next time. The next time there will be an escalation of action, because you've allowed his past behavior. It could be a family pet that takes the brunt of his angry outburst, or it could be you. You could be on the receiving end of the flying objects, his fists, his hands around your throat, squeezing the life out of you,  a knife, or even a gun. Especially if you talk about leaving, that is the most volatile topic, for an abusive man, they don't want anyone else to have you, whatever actions that they deem necessary to stop that from happening.

Domestic violence is no joke! A woman or man in that situation may find it hard to actually truly SEE themselves, there is a lot of shame with being an abused person, usually you're cut away from the people that love you the most, that could be your support system, it's all in his plan of total domination. Your self esteem is at an all time low. You protect the person that is abusing you. It takes a shift in perception for you to even recognize the person that you've become, you can look in the mirror and not even recognize yourself. An abuser is a master of manipulation, they have to be, or you wouldn't be living in that situation. 

There is NEVER any excuse for someone to put their hands on you, the blame/wrong doing is solely on the hands of the abuser.

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

B Fit: Ways To Manage Your Stress

I have no doubt in my mind that you have dealt with some kind of stress recently in your life, we all have, stress is a very regular part of the human condition. Stress is often thought of as one of the worst things for your health, often seen as a leading problem, when it comes to certain diseases. Stress is seen as the ultimate villain on your health, perhaps it's time we discuss this.

Change your beliefs on stress

A study at Harvard University, found that by rethinking  your stress as 'helpful' not only made participants feel less stressed, but also changed their physiological response to stress. We have all heard time and time again, how hard stress may be on your body, the negative effects that come with stress. Beliefs, whether inherited or our own, when we hear, read or see something and believe it, it often becomes our truth. When it becomes our truth, it then effects the decisions, actions and future beliefs we may have, it encircles. Whether something is really true or not, it becomes our truth.   This Harvard study shows that our beliefs on stress, are part of the reason why stress effects us so deeply, because we think it does.

Which brings me to my next point...

We need to stop pretending that we aren't in control of our own thoughts, stress doesn't just HAPPEN to us. Yes, life is full of stressful situations, but you may also want to note, that stress effects some people differently, some people become distressed while others find their calmness. Some people see the silver lining of each stressful situation, while others only see the road crumbling beneath them. Perhaps the only difference between these people, is perspective. Most of the stress we have, is stress created by our own thoughts, left alone with our own thoughts we will often look for the bad that may be coming in our future. We will create the worst outcome dramatizations, allowing ourselves to feel how that would feel. This is creating your own stress. Not only will we envision the worst that could happen, but we will see situation, thinking of the most negative side, we will say things like "that'll never happen" or "this will be horrible". This is also creating your own thoughts. 

Thoughts become beliefs, beliefs become your truth, your  truth will dictate how you make every decision. If you want to change your stress level, change how you see stress and change how you see stressful situations. You can learn to calm yourself, you can learn to slow things down, you are not the victim to your thoughts.

Careful who you surround yourself with..

It is often said, "be careful who you surround yourself with, you become like the people that you associate with", although, I believe you can choose which behaviour from other people that you allow to become your truth, I also believe, when we are comfortable with a certain person, their behaviour becomes contagious. I believe, if you are in a situation with someone who is easily distressed & negative, you are more susceptible to become a little on edge yourself, whereas, if someone is very calm and positive, you are more likely to be calm and inherit their positivity. I think you want to be aware of who's around you, who that you should or shouldn't go through in stressful situations. If you know someone that is often calm, is solution orientated, this is the type of person you want to talk to when you are stressed, these people will often make you feel better about your current predicament. If you know a certain person is often dramatic or negative about most situations, going to them with your stress, isn't the best idea. These dramatic people will most likely validate your worry, dramatizing it, because this is their truth. I advise you of this because stress is better dealt with, when we share it with those we love, when we allow them in, to help us manage our own minds. Left alone stress will eat at you. It  isn't always possible to find someone you completely trust to let in, I suggest if you aren't sharing your problems or life stresses with trusted people, talk to yourself as someone that loves you would.

The sooner that you realize that you are in control of your stress, your happiness and any thoughts that pass through your mind, the sooner you can turn things to your favor. We often subconsciously undermine ourselves, this has to change, make the choice, decide that you will no longer let your thoughts or worry, get away from you. You are in full control of any and all your thoughts, decide what you want to become your truth.