Thursday, January 29, 2015

B Men: You Sent Her A Picture of What? To Send or Not To Send?!


Here is a topic that we've wrote about before, but it doesn't seem to get old or change. I will expand it this time to talk about pictures altogether, not just penis pics.

I have recently been the lucky (unlucky?!) recipient to an unsolicited penis pic. The conversation went something like this:


Unknown male: Hey you! :)

Me: No reply

Unknown male: Do you have more pics of yourself?

Me: No reply

Unknown Male: Unsolicited penis pic!!!

Me: Oh my eyes!!



I get that somewhere there has to be women that don't mind such out of the blue random pictures, or no male would send them, I'm not one of those women. Or is it one of those things that men like to receive, so they send them to a woman thinking that's what she would like to receive?! This brings me to my next topic.


Men and women share a lot of similarities, they also have some very vast differences, one being what we (as women) like to see and what you men enjoy looking at. Notice that there is an endless supply of magazines, sites, etc catering to men's needs for visual pleasure, and that's fine, I'm all for men having the options everywhere. If you notice even magazines for women,(of the naked male physic) the options are very limited, why is that you ask?! To answer your burning question, women are visual, but not the same ways that men are.
Because women fall in love through their brain more so than their eye's, it really isn't that far of a stretch to imagine that the same types of pictures don't have the same effect on women, as they do men.


So what is it, that the more delicate feline like women want to see? Do you send women pictures at all? Is there a picture type etiquette amongst women, that you guys haven't been able to crack the code on? There are lots of variables at play here, but I will try to broaden my answer to encompass different types of relationships or non relationships.


1) If you've never had a conversation with the woman...DON'T send her a random dick pic! Especially if you haven't even exchanged pleasantries with her, or unless you don't want to ever have an exchange with her....then hit "send" but, I'm not responsible for what type of social media that she reports you to...I'm just sayin.


2) If you haven't had the conversation with her regarding said pix.


3) You're more obsessed with the size than we are, so unless we've inquired, just don't!


4) If you share the smaller version of yourself with one woman... aka a relationship, simply ask her.



How do we know what a picture contains, what if I open that ish up in front of my grandmother, boss, gardener or anyone else for that matter?!

Also just let me mention, I'm not opposed to pictures, but there is a time and a place for everything.

So what is a guy to do, you want to share, but now I've frightened you off forever?!
Let's back up to the brainy creatures that us women are, so what is it that a woman would like or want?


If you've noticed the "50 Shades of Gray" phenomenon or know about the up rise of porn for women, the biggest difference, is that porn for women has a story line, it includes a ton of seduction and anticipation. How does this help you? I don't think that women are given enough credit for their imaginations, we have very vivid, wild imaginations. Therefore we are usually more open to a picture that is suggestive, but gives us room to us our imagination around it.


A large portion of men like to masturbate with either pictures of women or porn. Women aren't as much into the pictures, women use their imaginations or a lot of women watch lesbian porn. Which makes sense, because lesbian porn focuses on women and her pleasure, whereas porn is more  focused on the male perspective, his p.o.v and his pleasure.  


So what does this all mean to you? If you are wanting to send a picture to a woman, to really get her attention, take a sexy suggestive picture...which could consist of:

A) You wearing clothing, emphasis of your stomach, or the happy little trail that leads down from your belly button.

B) Jeans unbuttoned or unzipped.

C) Shirtless with jeans unbuttoned, the options are really endless.


Women like to use their brain, imaginations, we love seduction and anticipation, anything that conveys that in a picture, is right up our alley. I'm not saying that a naked picture is always out of the question, but talk to her about it, and she will let you know.


Don't send pictures with the expectation of getting pictures, a woman will send you pictures when she sees fit. Speaking her language, giving her the pictures that she enjoys looking at will get you further, than sending what "you" want to see. Again timing is everything, if she is in mommy mode or work mode, pictures may not always be as well received or how you intended them. Perhaps place a warning, giving her the heads up on a picture, this saves her the awkwardness of opening one up in front of co workers or her boss. Communication is your best defence/offense, learning what she likes, what she thinks is hot, will win you tons of accolades. A well played picture in the morning, can having her anticipating you and your next encounter.


Wednesday, January 28, 2015

B Fit: 21 Things I Know To B True


1.


Life can be hard...it's those beautiful moments and amazing people that make it all worth it. Never lose hope in those beautiful life changing, life defining moments.


2.


Timing can be fickle... You can want something to happen so badly day after day, no matter your efforts it will evade you. You can spend your time pining for something or someone, it may seem as though it/they are always just out of reach. This is called timing, let it happen, learn what you can and everything will come together.


3.


 You need at least one GREAT friend, it's one thing to have good people around you, but it's another to have someone(s) solid and unconditionally in your corner. Someone that'll fight for you and bet on you.


4.


When you have great people, you need to appreciate what they contribute to your life, remind them often with thank you's, love,  coffee, and reciprocity.


5.


You need to bet on yourself. You'll never lose that bet!


6.


When you decide you need something, I mean NEED it, resolving that it will be yours, it will be. You may need to fight to make it happen, but if it is a need, MAKE IT HAPPEN!


7.


Giving up on something that isn't working, isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength.


8.


NO is a great answer, when it's the answer you want to give. Give it as needed...


9.


You don't need to accept mediocrity or being unhappy.


10.


It takes courage to decide to be happy, to remove anything or anyone that would try and get in the way of that.


11.


 If someone wants to be in your life they will make any and all efforts to prove that. If they don't want to be, let their actions show that,  let them go.


12.


Never let someone tell you who to be, you get to decide who you want to be, who you are, never let anyone make you into someone else.


13.


When it comes to YOUR dreams, fight for them, endlessly!


14.


Charm will rope you in...make sure its genuine. SEE: Actions.


15.


Someone that has respect for you, won't put you in situations that can compromise things that are important to you.


16.


You can be great at ANYTHING, all you have to do is decide what you want to be great at and commit.


17.


LOVE  is never to be used as a pawn. Love is unconditional or bullshit. Love isn't altered by petty situations. You can be upset or angry, but true love is consistent.


18.


YOU bring something unique to the table just by being you, find your uniqueness and use it.


19.


Taking care of you needs should be high on your priority list, if you don't feel good it's hard to pass good, around to others.


20.


Kindness is underrated.


21.


Chivalry is necessary, he needs to hold the door and walk you to your door/vehicle. Let's not settle for less. 


Thursday, January 22, 2015

B Fit: 6 Things You Need To Hear



We as humans are neurologically programmed to look for comfort.

We often build our own box of "I can't or that's not for me".  We assign ourselves our own box, if you feel stuck, it's because you allow yourself to feel that way. Feeling stuck or helpless is never a reality unless you make it one.  Often change feels scary, especially if you've been "comfortable" for a long period of time, you are only confined by your own boundaries.


I hope you feel uncomfortable, I hope life throws you some lessons, because that's when the real beauty happens.



Nothing feels as good as conquering your fears and taking life on head on...


You're at your best when you're solving problems and handling life. You feel so much in the moments of change.  You see who you are, who you strive to be and your own true colors. Mediocrity, comfort and the sometimes boring day to day can leave you flat lining.



You are Brilliant


Yes, you. You may not always feel that way, but I know you are, we all are. Change awakens that. Change awakens your inner power.

You learn when you do something you or someone else thought you couldn't do it, that you are powerful. This is why you are here, reading this, this is why I'm telling you to do things that scare you or make you uncomfortable, they awaken your brilliance.


You can live through and push through those heart breaking moments. Those moments that you feel that you are trapped or stuck with no way out, you can overcome those and be a better person for it. I know you can, because I can, because I do. I, like you, have felt stuck, I've been frustrated and couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel.  We've all felt that way...




You are the creator of your own universe.

All you have to do is decide what you want, in life, in a job, in relationships and go for it. Anything you decide  you want for a matter of fact, is yours. Never accept "NO" as an answer, if there isn't a straight road to it, take a side road. When you have resolve and make a decisive decision, anything is within your grasp. I dont care if the odds are stacked against you or you don't feel like it's the right time in your life. There is no RIGHT time, there is now!



This metaphor...


In sales you learn that all it takes is one good sale, sure you'd love it if every sale was perfect, but that's just not the reality of sales. When times are slow, you keep in mind that all it takes is one good sale, one perfectly executed sale can not only change your week or month, but your attitude, which can change the trajectory of your sales. This can be a metaphor for your life, you may not feel as though you win all the time, but when you do, its spectacular.  Every sale takes some effort, it also takes believing you can close it. In life you need to believe in yourself. You need to know that you can accomplish the job. A flustered and confused sales person won't win your sale, a confident one will. Sometimes you have to fake confidence in any area of life, you won't always feel 110% confident, that's life, for those days, fake it till you are.


Life is a Rollercoaster


A rollercoaster filled with happiness, disappointment, beauty and sadness. It won't always be good, but it also won't always be bad. The things that happen in life aren't always your direct choice, we've all had bad, sometimes unspeakable things happen to us. Yet, we are still here to tell the story, to read of similar stories. That's the beauty of humans, we overcome, overcome and still fight another day.  Those utterly beautiful moments, laughing with those you love or falling in love, make it all worth it.




Never settle or accept status quo if you aren't happy, push for happiness and you'll find it.

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

B Beautiful: What Does Being Single Hold For You?






Whether it's cuffing season or another name that we associate with looking for another person.  It's everywhere, there's no escaping it... It can be suffocating, stressful and pressuring if you choose to see it that way. 

If you've ever muttered the words "forever single, I need someone or I'm lonely" then you probably have a pretty good idea of what I am trying to express to you. It's a new trend to be single, putting labels such as those on yourself or even worse, which would be to shame yourself, for your current position in life.  

Sometimes you're not even the person that will first influence this thought, until it's brought to your attention by family members, friends or the media. 


What does "loneliness" and being single hold for you? As well as your future relationships? 




Another Person Isn't A Cure For Your Loneliness    


Yes, we're all human, we will have moments where you feel lonely, you could be in a room full of people or in a long term relationship and still feel that way.
No one is exempt from this!   

But another person isn't the cure you should be looking for, this is a Band-Aid and only a temporary bliss.   

You need to be able to stand alone, influence your own happiness and positivity before you stand strong beside a significant other or anyone for that matter.   



   
Being Lonely Or Single Isn't An Excuse 


- This isn't an excuse to accept whatever comes your way or accept less than you deserve, in the sense of how someone treats you, because you feel that you're in need of having someone else there to fill an empty void. 
 
- To go back to old relationships because comfort and familiarity.  

- It's also not an excuse or justification to have hatred for a person that has what you don't at the current time. 

- To no longer care for yourself or wellbeing. 

- To have and spread a negative outlook on life in general.    




Make Being Single Your Choice


First off single is not a life sentence, death sentence, measurement of success or lack thereof. It has nothing to do with your standings or ranks as a human being. 

Single can be a very healthy choice for you to make...


To some people this may be a crazy concept, but this is the one that will put you strides ahead in the realm of self improvement, finding knowledge within yourself. You learn the most about YOU, when you take the time for self reflection.  

With every lesson and milestone you'll learn something new about yourself, as I always say you're an ever changing person.

Take advantage of the time you're given,  revaluate what you're looking for  and your standards. 





You should hold this with extreme value. Life works in funny ways, putting you exactly where you need to be when you need to there, not a moment before or after. This is no way insinuating that you always need to hang onto your single-dom forever  or avoid a potentially great relationship that comes your way. But, that you're not stressing out, searching everywhere for your next relationship, to fill a void or what according to you is a missing piece, because of being alone or loneliness. 
 
 The only person who can complete you, is yourself.


Making the choice to take a small piece of time to work on you, is time well spent for yourself and future relationships.

Thursday, January 15, 2015

B Men: What You Should Know About A Woman That is Hard To Get


What You Should Do When You Are Dealing With  A Woman That's Hard To Get
She's "Hard To Get" for a reason

Not because her ego outweighs her , or that she thinks that no one could ever amount to what she is expecting in another person, because her list of requirements goes to infinity and beyond. If you see it from a shallow point of view, then I'm sorry to say "but you've probably already lost her!"

Her status in world has nothing to do with being hard to get, but it's her status with herself, the love she has for her inner goddess/being . It's the ratio of self love, balanced with the respect that she has for  herself, which  gives her a unique makeup. 


Being "Hard To Get" Has Nothing To Do With YOU   

Just in case there was ever a question in your mind, of whether the behaviours of a woman that fits this criteria was because of you...we're here to correct that. This has nothing to do with your efforts to court or woo her (while these do come into play). First and foremost, she is that way according to her own regard, it's part of what makes her amazing.   


Prove To Be Her Equal

Don't just tell her about the person you are or the one you will rise up to be, but, instead back it up with actions.


She doesn't expect perfection

Because if life has taught her anything, it's that she isn't perfect by any stretch of the imagination, she knows that to be human is to err.  Everyone is going to let you down in some way at some time, she doesn't believe in fairytales. Great relationships take work, they take a commitment to go above and beyond for another person. They take being able to put yourself in the shoes of another, what someone else says, isn't always what you hear, it means taking the time to make sure that you have perceived a situation correctly as it was intended.


Her life is a work in progress


She is a student of life, nobody has all the answers to life's questions and quagmires, but she is interested in trying to figure them out with you by her side. She doesn't expect you to have EVERYTHING figured out either.


She is very intelligent


She has her own opinions, beliefs and standards, she doesn't cave to other peoples, even if it means that she is only one left standing.


She is strong

She has experienced some of what life has to offer, there is no such thing as a free lunch. She doesn't live life looking for the handout or emotionally relying on someone else. Victimhood isn't in her vocabulary.


She will be the most beautiful woman you have ever seen.


Beauty is subjective and in the eye of the beholder, don't be intimidated by her beauty. Chances are, she's always looked like that, beauty is only skin deep and the most beautiful women know that. They don't rely on their beauty as a pass to the world, or as an excuse to take more than she gets from everyone.


If She's With You, She Means It.

Plain and simple, black and white. If she's with you...don't question her loyalties or interests.
She's there at her own free will , she respects not only her time, but yours as well. This doesn't mean that you will automatically earn each other's full trust, but that you will be making marks on what otherwise is a blank slate.       



She will test you


Probably not in the most obvious ways, she will observe you from afar, these are things that she will watch.

How confident are you? Are you really, or are you fronting? These women tend to draw men to them like magnets, you being confident in who you are, says to her "there won't be the drama of petty jealousy, because she chose you, no other man interests her or can steal her away."


Kindness/generosity...how you treat others, especially those that you don't have to necessarily go out of your way for.

Integrity

Trust

Loyalty

Honesty

Respect

Positivity

Driven/Passion..be passionate and driven about something, whether it's your job or your hobby.


She will love you, like no other.

When she commits to you, she will love and nurture you. It may take more to get her, but she is worth it. She doesn't expect more from you, than she is willing to give to you.


Who is she?

She is that woman that will elevate your life in every way possible, because with her, you will reach, she will challenge you, she will inspire you to be better in every possible way, not because she demands it from you, because that's how she makes you feel. When you encounter her, you will just KNOW, you may have heard others say "when you meet the right one, you will just know" it will all make perfect sense to you.



This type of woman is hard to get, BUT...when you do get her, you don't want to lose her because they literally ruin your life..not because of anything that she does in the end, retaliation/revenge are below her . Her loyalty is to a fault, she will be your best friend and your confidant, she will have put all her eggs in your basket, if you happen to do something to mess that up, chances are she won't be coming back. She isn't fickle or petty, so to lose her you had to do something to royally screw things up with her. The moral of this story guys...and to put it in plain english..."Don't f*ck it up!" ;) 

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

B Love: Don't Play Hard To Get B Hard To Get



Don't play hard to get...B hard to get


Playing hard to get implies that you are playing some sort of a game. I don't know about you...but when it comes to matters of the heart, anyone that is playing, should stay out of the relationship arena, that isn't gender specific, no one likes to feel that their heart has been lead astray by some joker or temptress.


Being hard to get says "sure I'm interested in a relationship, but not at the cost of losing part of me to you me or you losing part of you to me."


it says "I need to see who you are before, I commit myself to you"


it says "hey this is me, I want you to know me as well, so you know what you are getting yourself into"


it says "I like me, I cherish myself, so I need to make sure that you will cherish me also"


it says "I don't start things with every man/woman that comes my way.


it says "I'm choosey because I can be, I hope you are just as choosey also"


it says "I stand my ground, because it's important to me"


it says "I don't back down on my morals, values, and standards. You shouldn't either, if you do, we aren't for each other"


it says "I may not sleep with you right away, it isn't a game, it doesn't come with an automatic time stamp, that when we get to date 7.5, you automatically move past go, to sex"


it says "sex to me is sacred, I don't share my body with everyone"


it says "I don't work on anyone else time scale or schedule, it doesn't change with the amount of alcohol, promises, gifts or implied gifts, no matter how large or shiny"


it says "when I care about you, then and only then will we move to the next level"


it says "I don't care how much money you have or what you can do FOR me, my career or anything else for that matter"


it says " You were a choice, a decision, not a default, I can have anyone I want, but I choose you"


it says "I make time for you because I choose to, you are a priority for me, because I make you one"


it says "I'm choosing to be with you, because there is no other place on earth or other person that I want to be with"


it says "I choose you knowing full well what I'm taking on"


it says "because you are a choice, it isn't one that I've made haphazardly, on a whim because I didn't have anything more pressing to do with my time"


it says "I'm looking for my equal, not someone just to be a space filler or time keeper"


it says "I've chosen to see my past experiences/relationships as opportunities for growth instead of lackidazily sitting back and pointing fingers where I could"


it says "I'm not looking for perfection, because it doesn't exists, not in me, nor in you"


it says "I've not allowed past experiences to jade my thinking, assuming that all men/women are the same"


it says "I won't waste your time, if you aren't for me"



Being hard to get instead of 'playing' hard to get means; that I respect myself, which in turn means I will respect you, if I can't respect you, then it simply won't work, because I can usually find something to respect about a person, it's who I am as a person, it isn't conducive to who you are. I know the value of my time, my worth and what I have to offer another person, therefore I won't be short changed, because I know mine, I will recognize yours as well. Be the person in which you seek.